Saturday 29 June 2013

Day 180 - I will always remember Ellie. xx

Saturday 29th June

On a beautiful sunny day my off island roaming continues with an annual family picnic at a local country park.  Over the years I have got to know Donna's parents quite well and love them both dearly.  On this day, once a year, the 'Taylor clan' assemble and catch up with it each.  I was a spectator to something that is quite alien to me.  Donna is one of five children and her mother was one of eight so it is a big gathering and almost impossible for me to remember names or who belongs to who. 

I have a very small family.  I am middle child of three and my mother was an only child.  My father died a few years ago as did his only sister.  My sense of family began with my birth family and then developed as I had children of my own.  With four children there is definitely a strong sense of family, but not a strong sense of extended family.  The Taylor's all seem to have both a strong sense of their own family and the extended version that was gathered today. 

Over the years I think I have constructed families as I have collected people.  I have spoken here before how I hold onto people and how blessed I am to have so many lovely friends.  I make these people my family as they are just as important to me.  Maybe this replaces the lack of extended family members.  When I took up my first teaching job in Tower Hamlets I got up close and personal with extended families as many of them lived in the same housing block.  Grandmas looked after children who moved effortless between various homes feeling safe and loved.  I have spoken about my wonderful Grandmother, Ella, here before and today I observed another wonderful Grandma.  Donna's mum Ruth is, for me, the definition of Grandma and mum all rolled up in a nice sticky bun.  She is adorable and adored and that is rare.  Ruth and her lovely husband Ken were right at the heart of today and must be very proud of their personal gene pool.  Not all their children could make it but those that were there brought along their children and even grand children.  Then there were the older children to play with the little children so that mums and dads could relax and catch up. 

This was family at its very best and a joy to behold.  From the almost 90 year old driving down from Reading to the unborn child there was a sense of belonging that transcended the generations.  I was very struck by Ellie who is Donna's niece.  She has just finished her first year at Bristol university reading English literature so we chatted about books and writing.  Ellie is an incredibly grounded young lady who is at ease with talking to all generations on all subjects.  But I watched Ellie watching her Grandma and making sure she had everything she needed and I just knew that she has an important place in this world. 

With such a large family they don't see each other all the time but I am not sure that matters.  Through Grandma they all know what is going on in each other's lives and communication is just so easy.  Grandma doesn't miss a trick though and takes in everything even when she looks like she isn't.  She has one of those all seeing eyes and I think they all know that.  I watched Grandma as she made sure she talked to all her children and did a proper catch up to check all was well.  I also watched her as more and more grand children sat down beside her for a chat.  Meantime 'Granddad' (with two ds) spent time with the little ones in a way that only a Granddad can. It is as if these grand people were weaving the finest gold thread through the gathering and touching everyone.  They even wrapped their gold thread round me and I don't belong to them! 

It was an easy and contented afternoon sitting among the trees and gently chatting.  It is something they do every year and it must have created so many wonderful memories.  I have known and loved Donna for many years and now I love all her family too.  Mind you, don't ask me to tell you their names, except Ellie.  I will always remember Ellie.

Do you think if we all keep our fingers crossed all night we will wake up knowing that Scottish island mum is a feature article in a national newspaper?  If it has been included you just know you are going to hear all about it!  And yes you can expect me to go pop!  A 'trying not to get too excited blogger signing off......'

Until tomorrow.  xx

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