Sunday 14th June
The birds were in great song this morning and although I couldn't get out of bed immediately I opened my window fully and enjoyed their company. It has been a strange day of missed opportunities that I do not seem to care about. Over the years I come to realise that I can't always do what I want to do when I want to do it and so I just let go. Today I figured that anything I could do towards my two big events coming up would be a bonus. Even at plodding pace I can still achieve quite a lot and today was no exception. I completed the mosaics and did my usual trick of covering myself with grout. I then moved on to hand painting a selection of scarves and other accessories including a customer order. Tomorrow I will move onto candle making and the stall is beginning to take shape.
I did make three cups of tea that I then forgot about them and I also stubbed my toes on numerous pieces of furniture but these are not surprises to me. It takes a while for things to return to normal and so my elderflower cordial and strawberry jam dropped off the list but I think I will survive. But I had enough movement to do a little jig when a favourite tune came on so I can't be that bad. I am trying to perfect my bad dancing for when we meet Molly's man later in the summer. I am quite sure she would love me to show him my moves....
I have a structure for my stress busting manifesto and I appear to have generated quite a bit of interest in it along the way as well. Now all I have to do is put it together and then get it online. I do have quite a bit of writing to do while on the Isle of Eigg in a few weeks time but I also have lots of time. So, I will be taking all my ideas with me and hope to publish soon after. It seems to me that writing a stress busting manifesto from the isle of Eigg might set just the right tone.
Sometimes I get myself in a pickle and this often happens when I have had a relapse. It is as if I lose my sense of judgement. I am fortunate that I have a lovely family and lots of lovely friends who sort me out. Today one of my friends rescued some of my thinking and I am so grateful. I am an extremely positive person but this illness makes me more tired than words could ever describe. When I get this tired some of my decisions head off in the wrong direction and then I get a bit lost. My friend found me feeling a bit lost and set me back on the right track again. Friendship is a massively important part of life and often under-estimated. My take on friendship will feature in my stress busting manifesto and so it should. I am blessed with so many lovely friends and I do hope I never take any of them for granted. If I did I would expect them to yell at me.
I see friendship in different places and my studies in Buddhism have taught me an enormous amount about the importance of other people. I work really hard to limit any impact that my ego might have and I spend some time each and every day thinking about the needs of someone else. It has been a tough few weeks for some of my friends and I think I have been acutely aware of that. Sometimes you just want to take the pain away but you know you can't. That has been my experience of late so I got myself in a pickle and then another friend came along and sorted me out. I think this is what makes the world go around.
I am, without doubt, my cat's best friend. When she lies down next to me she puts a paw on me and then she feels connected. Only then will she go into a deep sleep. I need to take note.
Until tomorrow. xx