I am not a Christmas card sort of person but I do send them to people that I know don't use the Internet so that I can wish them a very happy Christmas. I was grateful for the exchanging of Christmas cards that managed to be sustained over the years between the lovely Di (side order of purple) and me as it kept the door open. Our lives had taken unexpected turns but the door being left open meant that earlier this year our friendship was able to be re-discovered in all its glory. So, there is a place for Christmas cards.
On opening one today though we were greeted with the shock news that someone the entire family holds very dear has recently died. Irene was the very best of people and her and her husband, Peter, hold a very special place in our hearts. When we visited them they could never do enough for us and we were all overwhelmed by their kindness. The sadness of her passing is added to by the fact that Peter's life must now continue without her. So there were tears this morning and lots of them. Irene had a favourite amongst us and that was our Molly. Irene and Peter only had one child, a boy, who is now the same age as me. Molly was the daughter Irene never had and she adored her. Molly adored her right back so right now I am wishing Molly was not hundreds of miles away. It is time for my girl to be home.
Irene was the best of the best because she was probably the kindest human being I knew. She was probably one of the most cheerful people I knew. These traits are not easy to maintain and I always admired her for them. Irene inspired me to be better than I was and she will continue to do that despite not sharing the earth with me anymore. I will miss her every day for the rest of my life but I also know that she left a little bit of herself with Molly and I will take enormous comfort from that. Today I have the task of writing a letter to our dear Peter in the hope that I am respecting his privacy while letting him know how much we care.
Despite all the tears we did take some time out as a family today and went out for coffee. George is proper poorly so he has now taken to his bed to try and recover. We all agreed that we need to slow down for a while and get healthy again while spending as much time as a family as possible. We discussed serious issues like where best to hide the TV remote from Molly and all the Christmas activities that are begging to be attended to. It felt good today and I could so feel Irene approving.
Every year at this time the university offers start to dribble though the system and this year I have helped even more students with their applications. On the whole they are receiving just the offers they were hoping for but occasionally things don't work out so well and there is the inevitable disappointment. I understand the disappointment completely and for these students life suddenly gets a lot tougher for a while. It is hard enough knowing what they want to study and where without their first choice rejecting their application. In almost all cases the student takes that as a rejection of them as a person. Nothing could be further from the truth. In a great many cases it is due to existing grades not being high enough and their application is thus rejected at the first stage. Universities receive thousands of application and they have to have a sifting process otherwise they would never get through them all.
So, what is the thing to do when you receive a rejection letter? I believe that there needs to be a period of time to let the news sit for a while before even thinking what the next step should be. You can apply to universities as late as August if you decide to access the Clearing system and there are a lot of good courses that enter Clearing for a range of reasons. I believe that the right course is out there for all students and each student has the ability to make their eventual choice a success because of what they bring to the experience.
That all said I do remain frustrated with the quality of the advice given in schools. Getting into university is not easy and good preparation is absolutely key. The lower sixth year should be when potential students visit university open days and read through all the prospectuses to make some initial choices. The summer term is when the UCAS application should be introduced so that the students have the summer to pull it together. Technically students have until the end of January (or March for art students) to submit their applications but that is not how many universities work. The popular and highly specialised courses fill up incredibly quickly so if they find themselves in those areas applications need to be in in September as soon as UCAS opens. First interviews will be rolled out by the end of September with many courses full by the end of November. I hope that this information may be helpful for anyone who is contemplating entry for 2015 as they can structure their preparation better.
I am also a fan of taking a year out if that seems appropriate. It is not the answer for everyone but it does suit many students. The reality of this choice is that they know their grades on application making the offer process much easier and quicker. They should, however, use their year well to develop relevant experience in the field they are hoping to enter. It gives the students a chance to see if their future does, indeed, lie in this area. The main thing to remember is that, for most of us, life is a marathon not a sprint. There is plenty of time to make informed and sensible decisions that you feel comfortable with. It is important not to get bound up with what friends are doing as this colours your judgement as well. University is for a minimum of three years (under normal circumstances) and it has to be a decision made by the student. I often get asked to comment on best options and I resist that temptation because it is not my future. I think that is right. For many young people it is the first major decision they will make so I would advise lots of time to make it in. I am also asked what is the most important factor in making the decision. My experience does help here though and I always advise it is the course that should be the key factor, then the university and finally the place. There are potentially endless factors to take into consideration but that just leads to muddled thinking and anxiety. The course must grab you in the first place and you must feel both comfortable and excited about the university. These are the most important factors to help guide you in your decision and this is why Open days are so important.
I would just like to take this opportunity to wish all the applicants that I have worked with this year the best of luck and I am quite sure that wherever they end up all will be well.
Until tomorrow. xx
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