Friday
13th September
Scottish
island mum knows how to stir up trouble for herself. Ever since the post last Sunday about
belonging to the storm I have been drawn into almost endless conversations about the issue of belonging. The debates have come in all shapes and sizes
and all echo feelings of struggling to belong.
They are, however, all completely unique and personal and I feel humbled
that people felt moved to contact me with their stories. It is not an easy topic and I respect
everyone's journey and hope that any comments I have made have been
helpful.
Regular
readers will know about my fascination with island living and the Scottish
isles in particular. They will also know
about my writing retreat on the isle of Lewis next May. I hear recently that the facilitators of this
retreat are planning a move themselves and I was naturally curious. They moved to Lewis in 2010 and took crofting
into their souls while establishing a thriving publishing business. The time has come for a move or as Sharon
puts it a shedding of skin. They are
Ireland bound this time and I do wish them well. Sharon's recent blog post unravels the
reasons behind the move and makes very interesting reading.
My
discussions on belonging have focused on people and place but Sharon adds an
additional element. She sees culture as
an important aspect of belonging and is craving her Irish roots with all its
wonderfully rich cultural expression. I
think there is merit in this argument and I need to ponder further. I was brought up in England but both my
parents had scottish births and upbringings.
Technically I am Scottish but I must admit to feeling slightly torn on
the issues of my nationality. I put
British when asked to record it and that feels about right. I need to think through the cultural context
for my own issues on belonging and see where it takes me.
Not
wishing to jinx anything but just to signal that there is some interest in my
writings about island living and a body of work may well develop as a
result. Using 'threads that bind' as a
metaphor I am hopeful of finding a home for this work as it unfolds. Early days so I am saying no more!
Meantime
I can tell you that people make belonging a reality for me. Beyond my family I am blessed with a
ridiculously large number good friends that I work very hard to maintain as
they are all so special. Within that
group I obviously have a few that are really close and we 'speak' most
days. I always consider them my other
family as we have stumbled across each other over the years. This week has not been my best week and most
of it disappeared in a free fall of strong painkillers and fitful sleep. I can not get away with anything though and
these close friends have been on me to explain why I am so quiet. Sometimes there isn't much to say. But I do feel a strong sense of belonging to
these people and I am incredibly grateful for their continued support and
friendship. For me that is belonging as
it needs to be.
Many of
you will know all about my friendship with the lovely Di and how it has been
rekindled after years of absence. Back
in the day no one shone as brightly as Di and I always felt blessed to count
her as a friend. Since the rekindling of
the friendship we speak all the time and share so much of our lives that I feel
she is right by my side. A while back Di
wrote her interpretation of the time we rediscovered just how much we mean to
each other. Di is joining me on one soul
many hearts with her own column - a side order of purple and I could not be
more pleased. This feels like the
beginning of a new and very exciting chapter and I sense our journey together
could be life changing. Her piece which
she titled 'The Mamma Mia Moment' is written in our own very unique and
accessible writing voice. You will get
it, I am sure. Off on holiday tomorrow
but blogging with continue as normal. In
light of touching on the issue of friendship I would like to send love and
blessing to the family and friends of a Fiona McGovern who has tragically lost
her fight with cancer. May her soul rest
a while among the flowers as the world mourns the passing of an angelic
spirit.
It came
to mind the other day as a Mamma Mia
Moment…
perhaps its sign of being a “certain age”, picking up the threads of something back in the day…
Perhaps,
above all, it is about re-locating the elements of ourselves that made us
fundamentally “us”, way back before we became
lost in being a “parent”, or striving to make our
work, well, work. Re-discovering our identities as individuals rather than as
family makers
For many
reasons, paths no longer cross. Time goes on and those pathways was they were
become over-grown where other ( necessary) priorities take hold: work,
children, new relationships … Then the awkwardness – how do you re-establish communication when you’ve been away so long?
Circumstances seemed awkward, having needed to cut away from a previous life
and forge a new one
Sticking
your head above the parapet and waving a tentative “hi” is not to be taken lightly
after so many years of radio-silence. Especially when, sadly, there are other
instances where the frequencies have stayed closed…
Then 2
chance opportunities in the space of a few months … both born of hardship and
crisis for others.
A door
opens… the
squeal, the hug, the “Oh My GOD !”… and all those years fall away. So much that hasn’t been said to catch up on… what happened back in the day… what about… tales of the kids… plans…. As if the years were just
days! And as ever, so much that we didn’t get quite get on to..…
Coffee,
cake and shopping… we
used to do this all the time. But then it was Mothercare and ELC, now its Paperchase
and Cath Kidson….
See, we have reached a certain age!
Once so
close, on the same wave length… and refreshingly just the same.
Time and
distance all linked so easily now in our virtual age.
The
threads have been re-connected.
How
fabulous
And,
cue music……..
Until
tomorrow. Xx
No comments:
Post a Comment